"Hey, aren't you in my drama class?"

The seven words that changed my life.  Who knew the funny guy sitting in front of me was going to have the biggest impact in my life that anyone (save Rick & "Lindaaaaa!!!") had had or would ever have.  The year that followed was nothing short of magic as my life was literally transformed.  Up until then I had always sat on the sidelines watching others shine but that funny freckled-faced kid who made all the girls (as well as the guys) laugh   brought out the funny kid in me and like some heretofore undiscovered alchemy, we bonded for life and were inseparable.  The drama school antics, the all night basement sleepovers, the call on Christmas morning in which you excitedly told me you got A GUITAR, the ill-fated trip to Birmingham (squash, why did it have to be squash) where you met another brother from another mother, Forrest (chicken tendez!) the stop in Demopolis that tested our bond: high temperatures and even higher tempers, oppressive humidity, White Wolf sprawled in graffiti, our brief but glorious careers as songwriting partners, you making my mom laugh until she cried during an otherwise uneventful game of Scrabble, and your indignant response to my relative's query "Do you like barbeque?"  Pure gold.

"The Mouse That Roared." "Bye Bye Birdie."  Our mutual love for girls and Van Halen.  Summer nights.  Stellar Cellar. "Little Guitars." Circus magazine.  Hit Parader.  Pinwheels and Mountain Dew.  The illicit joy of contraband Playboys.   Marianne Gravatte.  The Eddie poster.  The fresh smell of brand new cassette tapes.  "The Last Horror Film."  Channel 99.  Heavy metal videos on "Night Flight" and not MTV.   The piece de resistance that was "1984."  Kiss' "Asylum" vs. Yngwie Malmsteen.  Our nascent co-directing ventures: "Alone Again," " L.O.V.E. Machine," and "Smokin' in the Boys Room" shot in grainy security camera video.  "Invasion of Your Privacy."  The return of Marianne Gravatte.  "Amadeus," "Witness" (Jo??) and "Dune" (thumbs down.) The discovery of The Lucky Bean.  The detention sentence heard 'round the school.  Jo's handwritten note of despair.  "Trick or Treat."  "Sid & Nancy" ("Can't y'all watch anything better than that?)  "Shit, that's hot!!!"   John and Joyce Ann vs. the porch swing.  The daily stare-offs with Johnny.  The impending arrival of Justin ("I've got nine months to get used to the idea.")  Moon boots.  Prank calls regarding big noses.  Battle of the Bands.  "Iron Man" ad nauseum.  "Theater of Pain."  The invention of clear cassette tapes.  Eric Johnson.  Stanley Jordan.  Ratt N' Roll.  Rockin' With Dokken.  Clownin' With Brown.  Autograph. "2010: The Sequel...Hell!"  "Pressed For a Sequel."  Going on location.;) Diamond Dave leaves VH.  "Summer of '69: those were the best days of my life."  Truer words...

The move to Naperville.  The end of junior high, the beginning of our next phase.  The anticipation of your latest cassette tapes in the mail.  Your growing prowess as a home recording artist.  "Doubling the vocal line makes the voice seem stronger."  "Jayce." "Progressions Expressions."  "Metaphysical Dream World." The Deem/Murphy Experience.  Your trip in Damon's Corvette.  Rush, natch.  "Video Hell."  Van Hagar and the first box of "5150" tapes.  "Rocky shot a hole in his head."  Snickering during "The Last Temptation of Christ."  The Field becomes the 5150 Field.  Stars at night.  High school blues.  The miles between us deepening our bond.  Killer Kroger shopping carts.  Kevin Clean and the Case of the Commandeered Video Footage.   Who's this Chris Tisone fellow?   Swapping homecoming horror stories.  Skidding station wagons and the coining of the term "flopperoo."   Kristin Kliner - hubba hubba.   Graduation.    Jayce is moving to Chicago!!!  A long four years but worth the wait.

Columbia College.  El train to Granville.  Marcia.  The infamous Cubs game outing wherein you gave me my first drunk.  Wasting away in Margaritaville.  "Everything is a perfect sky." Thee Dollhouse.  Worst.  Lapdance.  Ever.  "Our special on Sunday.." (slap) You getting the itch to go out west.  Your going away party.  Ani.:)  Four years go by in a blur.  Gone, baby, gone.  Now what?

L.A.  Great Moments In Bad Planning.  You welcoming with me sage...and Sage.  My heavy heart.  Dina Bogina (ok, Bogino.)  The Subway Killer.   Do over!

Take 2.  New Hampshire shenanigans.  You teaching me poker.  My first high (cough, hack.) Westmoreland.  You vs. the musical horn.  Your first gig at Highland Grounds.  "Thank you, good night!"  @#$%!!! The mother#$%&ing Roxy ("world famous Roxy.")  A new cast of characters: Drew, Howard, Elaine, Bunga.  Tucson.  Behnken wedding in the desert.  You and Bunga bungling the babes.  "Must. Keep. Complaining."  My one one last stand.  Dry heaves on the way to the airport.  Flying home hungover.  Never again (sadly.)

Kristin.

Downtown meets for lunch.  Chow fun.  Shakey's pizza.  The @#$% your pants story.  Stealing paint.  Brass Monkey.  You breaking the news re: you and "Krissy" moving in.  Are you convincing me or yourself, Jayce?;)   Your desert bachelor party.   Tripping the night...fantastic.  "Put down the trail mix, Luke!"  Crazy Girls.  "I'll Wait."  The Cheetah's fiasco ("I don't think your friend enjoyed it.")  Mass Jager exodus.  Me propping you up.  Bush 1, Jayce 0.  Guess I'll clean that door tomorrow.  Genghis Cohen and the birth of Jason Roe.  KCRW.  Jennifer Z and Emma Jane.  Your wedding.  e.e. cummings.  Monkeybread.   More characters:  Amy, Dupree, Wendy, Bo.  ConCEPtual.  The apocryphal video for "She." Spoiling Sage.   Bowling league with The Surgeon.  Goodbye Westmoreland, hello Park La Brea.  Game nights with Amy "The Laugh Track" Rachlin ("Don't forget your Force!")  BBQs.  Holidays.  Birthdays "On The Beach."  St. Patrick's Day cheeses.

Elliot.

The Murphy nose.  The Godfather.  Missing her 1st birthday (worst. godfather. ever.)  Strolls through the park.  Meals at the Farmer's Market.   Kings in the Corner with Joyce Ann.  Tears of laughter.  WaJeTeHo!  Nashville's shadow looms.

The Day.  Sheer dread.  Packed cars, pods, and U-Haul.  The 3rd time we say goodbye.  Goodbye, friend.

But not for good.

25 years.  A quarter of a century.  1/3 of the average life span.  Golden years.


"Hey, aren't you in my drama class?"


Happy 40th Birthday to my best friend.

Love Always,

Wardly (T-Diddy, T-Dub)